


A Product of the Heart

by MyrandaJo



Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon compliant but I ignore the end of KH3 where everyone’s suddenly cool with Xehanort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:27:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27588133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyrandaJo/pseuds/MyrandaJo
Summary: "Kairi knew he wasn’t really there. She, Sora, and everyone else had sacrificed so much to defeat Xehanort and he had given up; he was gone. But, each word felt like a knife sinking into her and she fell to her knees from the pain, no longer able to stop the flow of tears she’d been on the brink of all day. She wanted nothing more than to tell him that what he said wasn’t true, that he was lying, but…"As Kairi begins her training with Aqua, she's troubled by another vision of her old enemy.
Relationships: Aqua & Kairi (Kingdom Hearts)
Kudos: 9





	A Product of the Heart

Kairi planted her Keyblade into the ground and leaned her weight onto it, steadying her breaths and wiping some sweat from her forehead. Her hair hung over her eyes and obscured her vision so she started when she felt a hand on her arm, but eased her shoulders when it was just her teacher. Aqua noticed the jump and stepped back, letting her own Keyblade dematerialize and offering her a small smile.

“You’ve made excellent progress already, Kairi. I’m proud of you!” Noticing Kairi was still catching her breath she added “Would you like to call it a day?”

“No!” Kairi shouted. “I mean… Sorry. I just really wanna get this right.”

Aqua nodded. “Of course.” She took her position several feet away from Kairi and summoned her weapon again, her shadow blocking out much of the pattern on the ground from the stained glass window behind her. Kairi stepped out of it. “Whenever you’re ready.”

Kairi tucked her hair behind her left ear and took in a deep breath, planting her feet and holding her Keyblade with just one hand as Aqua had shown her. She made adjustments to the stance until she was comfortable and gave her instructor a solid nod. “Ready.”

“Alright. Hey, Kairi, can you remember something for me?” Aqua turned for a moment and looked back at the dais where her own master once stood. Kairi leaned slightly to look curiously over her shoulder. “You said you wanted my help to grow stronger. Strength is an important part of being a Keyblade wielder, and I understand why you feel you need it. But, it’s not all there is. And… even if it was-” She turned abruptly back around and shot three blasts of light magic at Kairi, which she quickly deflected with a force shield. “You already have so much of it.”

Kairi looked at Aqua for a moment, then diverted her eyes to the ground, frowning. “Really?”

“Really.” Kairi watched Aqua’s shadow move as she walked toward her, then leaned forward on her knees to meet her eyes. “Kairi, part of being strong is believing you are. I understand what it feels like to doubt yourself, but if you give into despair like that, you’ll lose yourself.”

“But, I-” Kairi heard her voice shake and stopped, turning away. 

“I understand. But you are strong. Please, try to remember that.” When Kairi didn’t turn back to her, Aqua walked back to her spot and shifted naturally into her own fighting stance. “I’ll show you again.” She demonstrated the spell Kairi was trying to master once more, this time aimed at a stationary training dummy they had set up. Kairi tried to notice and replicate every movement, but when she tried it just didn’t come out quite right. She yelled in frustration and tried again and again, but each time it only came out weaker, fizzling out before it hit the target. 

“Useless.”

“What?” Kairi whirled back around and saw that Xehanort now stood in Aqua’s place, the hood of his black cloak pulled back. He made no movement toward her, only stood with his arms grasped behind his back and smiled. Kairi stared at him in horror, defaulting to her usual crouched stance. “What are you doing here?”

“You’ve been training here for hours and yet you have nothing to show for it. You’ll never become a master in time to help your friends.” Kairi tried to argue, but she felt a lump in her throat keep her from speaking. “Perhaps, this isn’t the path meant for you after all. You’re a princess of heart, meant to stay behind and support others from afar, protected by those who can fight for you. I knew it from the moment I saw you. And, you know it too, do you not? It’s… regrettable. The blade you hold in your hand was bequeathed to you on accident by the same master you’re trying to learn from now. But, the two of you aren’t the same, are you?”

Kairi knew he wasn’t really there. She, Sora, and everyone else had sacrificed so much to defeat Xehanort and he had given up; he was gone. But, each word felt like a knife sinking into her and she fell to her knees from the pain, no longer able to stop the flow of tears she’d been on the brink of all day. She wanted nothing more than to tell him that what he said wasn’t true, that he was lying, but…

“You can’t truly believe they’ll ever want you to come along? You’ll only be in their way. They’ll risk their own lives to save yours. When the opportunity comes for you to fight back, you’ll stand motionless. You’d be better off staying locked away on that island you call home, or asleep and dreaming away from the fight. I sent you away without your memories all those years ago, so one of them must hold the key you’re looking for. Wouldn’t that be a better use of your time? Tell me, did you know that Heartless come to places where the light is strongest so they can devour it? Could that be why they came for you and your home on that fateful night? What would have happened if you and your friends had tried to leave after all, the three of you alone together on the sea? The boy Riku must have realized long ago that you bring trouble wherever you go.”

“Just leave me alone!” she finally cried, blindly firing a blizzard spell and holding her head in her hands. She heard him parry the spell and come closer, but she couldn’t move. Her body shook and her Keyblade fell to the ground, and she could only cry. It was the first time she’d cried since Riku had left without her, and she felt all of the hurt and betrayal she’d been pushing down, all of the helplessness and fear from the last week pouring out of her. The footsteps grew louder and she instinctively summoned her Keyblade in front of her to defend herself, but Xehanort did not attack her. Instead, she felt arms wrap around her in a tight embrace. When she opened her eyes she saw that Aqua was there again, holding onto her, and Xehanort was nowhere to be seen.

She sobbed and flung her arms around her, struggling to get words out. “I- I saw him…”

“I know,” Aqua said, her voice calm and soothing. “And I don’t blame you. He hurt all of us terribly and I’ll never forgive him for that. But, he’s gone. He can never hurt you again.” 

Kairi sat there and cried a long while until her tears subsided enough for her to speak again and she quietly parted from Aqua, hugging her knees to her chest. “I think… some part of him is still in my heart somewhere. Maybe it’s not even him, really. I don’t know. Could that be true?”

She frowned. “Yes… But, why do you think that?”

“He was there in my dreams, when I was searching my own memories for clues. He said…. he was a product of my heart.” She made herself meet Aqua’s eyes and saw they were filled with concern. Everything he had said... “He was using all of my own insecurities against me, like he knew just how to hurt me most. It was… awful.”

Aqua blinked and looked away in thought. After a moment, she reached out a hesitant hand and Kairi took it. “I’m sorry. I don’t believe it’s really him. When I was in the Realm of Darkness, I fought against a mirror image of myself that spoke to me in a similar way. I believe that could be what you’re facing.”

“You think it’s… myself?” Kairi felt her face grow pale as all of his words swam through her mind. “But… I would never say those things.”

“Whatever the case, I’m afraid this is something you’ll have to work through and fight. But, you won’t have to do it alone.” She gave Kairi’s hand a squeeze and stood up, pulling her to her feet, too. “For now, you should rest. You don’t have to do all of this today.”

Kairi folded her hands together and her head fell. “I don’t know if I can do it at all. Every time I try to be good enough to help my friends and fight beside them, I fail. What he said hurt, but it was all true. Sora… he’s gone because of me.”

“Kairi. Please don’t take that blame for yourself. None of this is your fault. You should never have been expected to face such a big threat with so little time to prepare.” She paused a moment in thought. “Are you... training with me to try and be ‘good enough?’”

Kairi bit her lip and nodded.

Aqua put both of her hands on Kairi’s shoulders, her expression more serious and stern than she had ever seen it. “If there’s one lesson I want you to learn above all else, it’s that you are already enough. Okay? And, you always have been. I’d like for you to train for your own sake, without thinking of anyone else. Do you think you can do that for me?”

Out of the corner of her eye, Kairi saw Xehanort glowering and sitting on the throne with his head rested against his fist. She made eye contact and glared at him, and he sneered back at her a moment before he vanished. She looked back at her teacher and tried to think over her words. She couldn’t admit it to herself, but she wanted the approval and trust of the others more than anything else. She was tired of feeling the things Xehanort described, and she didn’t know if she would ever be able to stop trying to prove herself. But, maybe it was that attitude that made him manifest at all. It could be nice to do something for herself for a change. But…

“Sora always says that his friends are his power. If I train for myself, aren’t I neglecting the people I want to fight for?”

“Your friends will support you, and they’ll lift you up when you need them to, especially if you tell them you’ve been feeling this way. But, if you improve and learn for your own sake, you’d be surprised how much it changes.”

“Okay…” Kairi smiled, and for the first time since she’d begun training she felt some of the weight lift off her shoulders. “Okay! I’ll try. Thank you, Master Aqua.”

“You’re welcome.” Aqua gave her one more quick hug and smiled brightly. “You know what? Let’s go get some ice cream.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you couldn't tell, Melody of Memories upset me a little bit. :') But, I'm working through it. As are we all, in these trying times...


End file.
